Thursday, October 20, 2005

Getting better

These hard meds really are begining to make me feel better AND I'm not feeling as stoned on them... just like everyone said I just didn't beleive. Not to say that during the first few hrs of them I'm not still wonked to the gills, just saying that there are places in the day where I'm not in horrible pain AND I get to think as well. I can't tell you what a relief even a few moments of clarity without pain make me feel, I cried like a baby when it happened. I know that every day I spend on these meds will excated it's price come dose down day, and while everyone is really cool with the whole "I'll be there for you" stuff, I wish they wouldn't say that, I mean they will wittness it but it is something that you do alone or with G*d........ and if you fail? If you don't succed at dosing down and begin to use street drugs? Ain't no one gonna stick with you thru' that.... they can't even if they really want to. Of course I'm gonna win so that is that, no worries at all.

Yesterday I got to go to the new mall and look around. I move like a little old lady with out her walker. HA you can see all the youngin's avoid me like I got the plague! Which is ok by me. I can't yet walk, talk, and breath at the same time. I also have one more week before my flu shot kicks in.... I can't tell you how weird it is to be put in the same catogory as ppl over 65 or having immune system problems. But everyone seems to agree, coughing and throwing up could really hurt the barely repaired stomach mucsles. Basically it isn't the flu that I can't fight off but the side effects of the side effects could be mucho dangerous.

Well I'm off to go skip around the internet and see what everyone is up to! Peace!


Blogger Gawdessness said...

You write so well, I feel like it actually gives me a window in your experience.
I can't go through it for you but I want you to know that there are a lot of us on the other side of the window rooting for you.

Your comment at my blog really made me laugh.


9:49 PM  

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