The stupid things people will do
So I have to go into work late at night which takes me right by the airport. Which means I get to see people acting out in the most stupid ways possible and either almost kill me or involve me in their suicide attempts. The other night was a particularly bad night where in 3 people in separate incidence all decided to act very stupid.
The first person was in one of those big trucks, you know the ones that say "I have no penis and I'm hoping your too drunk to notice" trucks? Anyways we are on the street, not the highway mind you, and I'm going around a 18 wheeler truck because it is on the way to industrial park and this guy gets his choice of being stuck behind me or the 18 wheel truck at the stoplight. He is smart and choose me, we both pass the 18 wheel truck and he suddenly puts his petal to the metal and screeches out to go 4 buildings up the to McDonalds......... because I guess his order was ready? This is not a teen hang out area it is in the middle of an industrial park and across from a Best Western.... BUT ok he really needed to get to that McDonalds and it only slightly unnerved me.
The next guy REALLY pissed me off. This was a guy in a wheel chair in the middle of a turn lane going the wrong way with no reflectors on his chair or lights of any kind. He apparently was looking to commit suicide and thought I looked like I could help him. No he was not lost or hurt, he was apparently in an argument with someone on the sidewalk and had decided to go into the street to make his point. (this btw was only a block from the McDonalds) I wanted to get out and explain to the guy that while I support euthanasia for those who want it, that I was opposed to being volunteered without my consent in helping him out.
By the time I got to the third guy I'm on this single lane street. He is lost. Which I sympathize with but I have no patience for anymore this night. Besides the fact that it makes me nervous when cars are acting weird and I'm alone in mine. This guy keeps stopping suddenly looking around then driving slowly, then speeding up, then swerving, This results in me testing out my breaks in my car several times. I cannot get around him. Finally he goes in the right direction towards the lights of the airport (which I assume is what he wants) and get on my way.
I know you all think I'm paranoid when I say they are out to kill me and that Satan is really responsible for road planning but I think I'm on to something.
The first person was in one of those big trucks, you know the ones that say "I have no penis and I'm hoping your too drunk to notice" trucks? Anyways we are on the street, not the highway mind you, and I'm going around a 18 wheeler truck because it is on the way to industrial park and this guy gets his choice of being stuck behind me or the 18 wheel truck at the stoplight. He is smart and choose me, we both pass the 18 wheel truck and he suddenly puts his petal to the metal and screeches out to go 4 buildings up the to McDonalds......... because I guess his order was ready? This is not a teen hang out area it is in the middle of an industrial park and across from a Best Western.... BUT ok he really needed to get to that McDonalds and it only slightly unnerved me.
The next guy REALLY pissed me off. This was a guy in a wheel chair in the middle of a turn lane going the wrong way with no reflectors on his chair or lights of any kind. He apparently was looking to commit suicide and thought I looked like I could help him. No he was not lost or hurt, he was apparently in an argument with someone on the sidewalk and had decided to go into the street to make his point. (this btw was only a block from the McDonalds) I wanted to get out and explain to the guy that while I support euthanasia for those who want it, that I was opposed to being volunteered without my consent in helping him out.
By the time I got to the third guy I'm on this single lane street. He is lost. Which I sympathize with but I have no patience for anymore this night. Besides the fact that it makes me nervous when cars are acting weird and I'm alone in mine. This guy keeps stopping suddenly looking around then driving slowly, then speeding up, then swerving, This results in me testing out my breaks in my car several times. I cannot get around him. Finally he goes in the right direction towards the lights of the airport (which I assume is what he wants) and get on my way.
I know you all think I'm paranoid when I say they are out to kill me and that Satan is really responsible for road planning but I think I'm on to something.
posted by achromic at 10:35 AM
2 Comments:
I'm not sure if you were going for the funny here but I am cracking up. My favourite comment is about the truck...
"Hi, I have no penis but I'm hoping you're too drunk to notice," ROFL!!!
Oh my goodness. I needed a smile today.
I got the giggles from this, too, and loved the imagery. I wonder what the McDonald's connection is.....
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