Friday, August 25, 2006

Its a carnival...... so they tell me

Well the whole idea is explained far better here carnival

So what I want you to know............

1) I was gonna do this about my cat but then I decided my cat knows me well enough and can't read so that was pointless and futile and while I DO do futile things I usually don't know they are futile at the time of actually doing them.
2)Ya I know my spelling s**ks to the horrifcation of most of my totally brilliant family I came up with dyslexic and even with great spell check I can't spell right which basically made me hate anything to do with good English. But unfortunately I also crave to communicate my ideas and myself so I do write.
3)I totally don't care what you believe in unless you are trying to make laws that I feel would stop me from being free. Things like stopping me from killing myself, my fetus or smoking pot seem wrong to me not that I am actively pursuing the doing of any of those things at the moment. I just like to know that even if I am the stupidest idiot on the planet I still have the right to my own body and can if I want to do those things.
4)I don't hate America or the human race or little kids. I am child free but that is just how it worked out had nothing to do with disliking children. I actually think us humans are pretty cool animals I would like to see us survive I have cominted most of my adult life to things that are about that actually. America.... I was so ready to leave you when I thought you were ok, but now that I see you as soul sick and sliding down in a pit of apathy and spoilness I find that I cannot leave you ....... some how I want to make it better...... but I am realistic to know that I may just be one wittiness to a great decline.
5)I am ......... not well....... I am not sick...... in pain every day most of the time. I thought I would get better for along long time. I fought tooth and nail to get better......... but now I know it isn't. Whatever is wrong isn't clear enough for the doctors to fix. I do not understand my diagnoses. I donno if I don't understand because they are not clear or because I have become to sick in the head to hear it. I don't even know which one I fear more.
6)I play a game on the computer called world of warcraft. I make many friends outside of my apt. It helps me to not feel alone. But sometimes it keeps me from doing the things I should.
7)I am so proud of my spouse for going back to school and keeping a 4.0 and a 160 LSAT, the law schools were all sending him letters! And now he is there in school with all those big books. But I am also scared....... one day he will see himself as I always have and know he is too good for me.
Ok that is all I got that is me in a flash. Nothing big nothing crazy sorta boring.

4 Comments:

Anonymous baggage said...

It seems to me that your husband loves you a lot from reading your posts. Thanks so much for participating in the Carnival.

6:28 AM  
Anonymous Jenny Ryan said...

Good for you for not letting spelling stop you from expressing yourself!

We're child-free too, and in my mind that allows me more of myself, time, and resources to give to others.

Thanks for your post!

9:44 AM  
Blogger Granny said...

Honest as always.

Big hugs.

11:49 AM  
Blogger L. said...

Wow, I wish I hadn`t fallen behind in blog-reading while my parents were visiting -- it looked like a fun carnival.

Maybe your husband worries the same thing about you?

I`ve never met you, but somehow it sounds to me as if he loves you for what you are, and not due to whatever self-esteem issues he might have!

10:34 PM  

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